Monday, December 17, 2001

My grandmother passed away on sunday the 16th of december after a life of profound beauty and connection to the ftruth. She was a sharp lady, she was a women of the fields, and the country side, connected to a reality that was not fable or enchanted but rare and exquiste as if on a rural estate, on the grounds behind the main house a small cave with an under water stream was bubling and emanating a earthy and trebly aura that sputtered forth, providing nourishing and rejuvenating aqua de terre water enriched with benfit . just charming like that,and real . not beautiful and flowery ,but beautiful and strong and good for you just like bittersand salty mineral water, water from deep in the earth, good stock -etruscan lineage-and old old people- well bred --meant to live till very long in the tooth , meant to still be able to put up her dukes at an age when people have stooped and yeilded defering beaten won over by the illusion of life and the easy way do what the others, the younger the stronger say , dont make waves, nona was beautiful in her manifeatation of her identity, beautifiul in her presenting the world a form of strength, motherhood, perseverence, stubborn focus and determination, all that which is missing in the world of the soft of the trembling she lived and venerated the gift of life. and she died after two days on her death bed with all signs of that approachin g dpearture , from what my cousin told my mom the sweats , she was groggy in the morning just saying sylabllesthen she laid itn the bed, she lay down and just got ready to go , the polsih lady prayed for her all night, the next day the sisters spoke on the phone her breathing was slow and forced , and then she had finished her time here and was quiet on the bed, the end of life , the end of an era , a big building that says so much of time it was witness to, the world, now reteurned to its components , ther she is , very slight now on her bed in her room where i saw the picture of her young and smiling in a warm and fuzzy photo not really conforming to what the portaitist attempted to create, she redefined the photo, this is a women who is a sign , this is the one, here is purity and truth not betrayal not frustrated hopes or stifled aspirations here is where the the whole alchemy of us human beings is up and running the right way,like its supposed to, like old times from the get go from when the first quarter was put in the slot, hard lessons -but the root of existence kind of lessons, hurry up and keep moving we work now apart ,so we can join eachother later .here i the lady she did n't live in a shoe but she beat the hell out of me with that same shoe shoe one day, and i loved her for it , god bless the immortal soul of giulia ghilardi giulainetti